In August 2013 my primary care physician told me the CT scan indicates possible cancer and I should immediately see a pulmonologist. Easier said than done in Southern California, I could not find a pulmonologist that could see me for months. My wife pulled a list of all licensed pulmonologist in Southern California and just called one after another for the earliest appointment, and then if they accepted my insurance. I could hear her, hour by hour, day one, then day two as I wallowed in my despair. What a burden in the midst of her own anxiety. On day two an appointment was secured which resulted in a needle biopsy and formal confirmation, Lung Cancer. The pulmonologist had already arranged for me to see an oncologist and start chemotherapy. To the pulmonologist’s surprise, I declined all treatment so that I can absorb and process, despite being told time is of essence. Over the next few days I narrowed my Internet searches and discovered LUNGevity and immediately reached out to them. I spoke with Katie Brown, Vice President, Support and Survivorship Programs. In speaking with her, I instantly found a glimmer of HOPE. Katie gave me the name of a lung oncologist at a national cancer hospital near to me along with contact information. Rather than meeting, the oncologist sent me for an immediate MRI and within a day I was informed I had significant tumors in the brain. "I found a glimmer of HOPE" LUNGevity also have a LifeLine Support program and Katie introduced me to a mentor, Matt Ellefson, diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer. I immediately made contact with Matt and with his help I developed numerous battle plans rather than focusing on the war. Having rarely seen the inside of a hospital let alone all of the different people involved in a cancer diagnosis, Matt explained the role’s of folks I would encounter, devised a list of questions to ask to make meaningful decision regarding the most pressing matter, surgical intervention or radiation for the tumors in the brain. Because I had no family nearby, I used video calls on my smartphone to have input from a family member in another country, during my consult with doctors. As a result, I was able to make an informed decision to have surgical intervention. And what a fantastic decision it was.
Now, as I look back at this beginning filled with so much torment, angst, anger, bewilderment; I now see this journey is inevitable for me. I looked up and down and in crevices for help from a higher place. I didn't recognize it then, but Divinity was right there shining brightly through Katie and Matt, gently comforting and guiding me. Even today, I am humbled and on my knees in this realization.
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